For partners, parents, adult children, siblings, and friends

When you love someone who is trans or nonbinary

The people close to a trans or nonbinary person often have their own questions and feelings. You deserve a place to work through them, one that supports your relationship and the person you love.

This is the printed handout, word for word. Print or download it at the end of the page.

Does any of this sound familiar?

  • “I love them, and I’m still catching up.”
  • “I’m scared for their safety in the world right now.”
  • “Some days I miss how I used to picture things, and I feel guilty about that.”
  • “I don’t know the right words, and I’m afraid of saying the wrong thing.”
  • “My partner’s transition has me asking questions about my own identity.”
  • “Our intimacy is changing, and we haven’t really talked about it.”
  • “People around me don’t understand, and I have no one to talk to.”
  • “I want to support them without making it about me.”

You may be on a different timeline

Many trans people spend a long time understanding their gender before they share it. For the people who love them, it can feel brand new. That gap is common, and many families close it by working through it together.

Being trans or nonbinary is not something to fix, and your feelings aren’t a problem either. Support for you can go hand in hand with support for them.

How therapy can help you, and your relationship

Feelings

Make room for what you feel

Sort through worry, confusion, or guilt in your own space, and make sense of what is changing and what isn’t.

Words

Learn the language

Get accurate information and practice the names, pronouns, and words that show respect, including how to recover when you slip.

For partners

Closeness and identity

Talk through changes in closeness, desire, or your own identity, at your own pace and without judgment.

Connection

Stay close

Practice listening and open conversation, and decide what kind of support you want to be. They can join some sessions if you both want.

What this therapy is

Individual talk therapy for you, by telehealth. For partners, it can include sex therapy: talk therapy about sexuality and intimacy, with no sexual contact, physical touch, or exam.

Support for them matters too

Working with me doesn’t replace support for the trans or nonbinary person in your life. I support you, and I affirm your loved one’s identity. With your permission, I coordinate with others involved in care. Peer support groups can help too.

On this site

Outside organizations

Getting started

Request a free 15-minute consult at JosephMaronLPC.com or call 215-804-9315.

Telehealth for adults in Pennsylvania. Private pay; superbills provided for out-of-network reimbursement.

I’m Joseph Maron, MS, LPC. I work with adult partners and family members, including parents of trans teens. I see the parent, not the teen.

Joe Maron Therapy · PA License PC017785 · Doctoral student in human sexuality, Widener University · Certificate in Affirmative Therapy for Transgender Communities · ADHD-CCSP · LGBTQ+ affirming care

Print this handout

  • Resource handout · two sides

    When you love someone who is trans or nonbinary

    For partners, parents, adult children, siblings, and friends. Prints two-sided. PDF · 170 KB.

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